In every way possible, families have weird inside jokes.

For me, my mother and I are not fans of raisins, declaring the process of dehydration "A cruel thing to do to a grape."

My father is known to quote numerous Warner Brothers cartoons and I am pretty much privy to numerous gags.

We make fun of my uncle Rob, a Trekkie and general sci-fi geek all around saying he's technically a Vulcan who had surgery on his ears. He can find feasibility in sci-fi tech, but can't watch Phineas and Ferb because he finds step brothers with engineering genius to be illogical.

It sounds mean but we (me, Fiance and brother) refer to my older sister (Kayleigh) as "crap". It happened because when listing things, my brother often says "and crap" to mean "various other things" - e.g. "Gonna go clean my room and crap", "Gonna go see my friends and crap" etc.
My brother was taking about visiting my sister and our younger siblings and he said "I can't wait to see the kids and crap" and Adam replied with "You can't refer to Kayleigh as crap"... and then it just stuck.

Now whenever he say's something like "I can't wait to see the movie and crap", we'll reply with something like "Oh I didn't know Kayleigh was visiting!".

My parents will tell me in text message or phone call after spending more than 3 hours out or returning from vacation "We're on our way home...now would be a good time to clear everyone out and clean up the house."

I am not much to host parties because for Christmas of 2017, I nearly passed out trying to tend to the desires of a culinary nature to blood relatives, step family and in-laws (under my linguistics, an in-law is defined as someone who married into one's blood family) and I was in charge of the sodas and drinks (for wine drinkers, we made it BYOW).

My parents joke it's my reverse harem I had over the weekend. Once my parents arrive home, I said "Glad I didn't invite Stephen Colbert. He's such a party pooper."