It’s move-in day at the freshman dorm and total chaos. Cars and taxis, boxes and suitcases, kids everywhere looking lost. I love it! Pops took my boxes into the dorm while I took it all in. I didn’t recognize anyone from Widespot, although I would find out the green guy (Woody Weiss) is from there. He’s kinda weird, but OK. Oh, and is that Goldie Hart on the right?

I met Pooter Longly and Enga Land – not impressed with either one. And I don’t know what to think of the kids that are from WAY out of town (like, out of this WORLD!).



There’s one really pretty blue girl that is super friendly, hugging and kissing EVERYONE. Wow! Things at college are sure different!


I told Pops goodby and found my room, then got to know my dorm-mates. Woody thinks he’s tough, but he’s actually very shy. I think he’s had a very lonely life.


Pooter is really friendly, but sorta wild. I guess I didn’t want to know what happened to him…
The girls like to hang out in night gowns or (ahem) underwear; “Don’t mind US, we’re just trying out each other’s makeup and stuff”. I don’t think I’ll get much studying done.

The next few days Dixie and I went to some of the college places. Dixie says I have a belly and should get some exercise, so we went to the gym. But there was more beer drinking than exercising. Dixie wanted to fence, “It’s good exercise!”, but then she started drinking.
I’ve never heard her talk about boys, but she was eyeing a GIRL. Who cares, I needed a message after that workout. Umm, nothing like an elf massage.

There’s one guy there, Bozo Afar, that I can’t figure out (and don’t think I WANT to). He’s always wearing some costume and making stupid jokes. He calls Dixie “The Jaw” and thinks that’s a hoot. She ignores him.

Come to think of it, I don’t know why she’s dressed like a lumberjack. Maybe it has something to do with her not wanting to be “girly”. Maybe it has something to do with why I saw her putting a move on Goldy Hart (who looked pretty disgusted with it). Some people are put off by the way she eats like a starving truck driver; guess I’m used to it.

I suppose I must have gone to classes; I can’t remember if I ever studied. I’m majoring in business. But mostly I’m discovering GIRLS!
There are some really cool kids that drop in all the time, they wear black jackets and clearly are important. They seem to be watching me; it’s easy to make friends with them. One blond is especially “friendly”. Geez, I never got this close to a girl. She smells really good. Don’t tell mom, but she’s teaching me how to kiss. I think she’s from France.


I always knew Dixie was strong, and bull-headed, but that girl can throw a punch! There are a few people that show up and pull pranks; I ignore them, but she fights with them! The first time it happened, it caught me by surprise. I ran outside before I knew what I was doing. {ASIDE- and before the author could pull up the walls).


I’ve gotten to really like Eng. We fool around all the time. She’s shy, very level headed and sweet. She’s a horticulture major; I’ve decided to minor in horticulture. I think horticulture and business go together; like Pops, I like plants and stuff, but want to make a modern BUSINESS out of it. After she graduates, Eng just wants to get married and have kids. And that’s starting to sound good to me.

Eng and Dixie don’t like each; I think Eng gossips about Dixie behind her back. But ME – I must be in love.

I asked Eng to marry me. She said yes. She’s serious about college, and I’ve followed her example and am hitting the books. It’s easy for me; I didn’t realize she was struggling till she came in one day crying that she was on probation and went straight to bed.

I tried to reason with her, but she kept burbling that she got an “F” on her term paper “Knitting as a Spatial Representation of the Dimensions of Reality”. Not exactly something I am qualified to discuss. I’ll try to tutor her; she’ll get over it.
I invited my folks to visit. Pops and Eng hit it right off. I told Mom we were engaged. They both think she will make a perfect match.


We have decided to move to a rental house on campus at the end of the year. We will be able to study without the constant distraction of the dorm. Besides, I want some alone time with my girl.