Recently, I've been fighting a battle that no one who cherishes their family should go through: Separation.
My parents have grow weary of each other and decided to split up.

If this were The Sims 2 and onward, this experience would match how I'm feeling: In the red, mood wise.
It has left a bad memory in my heart.

(((((Hugs Pandaqueen)))))) Not fun, I know. Hopefully, your parents are doing the right thing, but I know it means a world of upheaval and big changes in your life.

It's not easy, but all of you will hopefully get through it soon enough, and maybe even get something positive out of the situation.

When my parents got divorced, it was actually quite nice. They had a tendency to argue a lot (my mom did, anyway), and in the end when they finally realized enough was enough, I felt the same.

I've actually got a better relationship to dad now, which is nice. While they still lived together, most of the time he was just the family's designated driver and handyman, and I hardly ever talked much with him. I also have a better relationship to mom, because she's much happier. The two of them have a slightly better relationship now. Sure, mom still isn't much happy with him, but he helps out if need be, and they can usually talk without arguing all that much.

A divorce isn't always bad for the kids, depending on the situation. Most of the time I even wish they'd divorced sooner.

I had a similar experience, simmer22, when my parents split, I got to know my dad as an individual for the first time. The times I got to spend with him were precious as they were away from older siblings. But it's not that way for everyone. I hope the best for you.

Well, tonight, dad and I are just staying in after running like crazy all over town. (Mom ran to her network of safety nets)

In case anyone was wondering, I wear a locket. In it, it once held a picture of Bill Nye (the Science Guy). Today, I replaced it with Australian-born actor Scott McNeil...To get a better visual, he looks like Kid Rock, but without facial hair and ripped, cut like a diamond. His most famous anime dub role (the one with the most exposure in anime dubbing), was that of Duo Maxwell of Gundam Wing. According to insiders, while recording the scene where the Deathscythe was destroyed, he had to remember back to the time his wife ran over his motorcycle. He screamed in voice long enough to pass out from exhaustion. He would repeat this line at MetroCon 2006 for a crowd of fans, albeit no passing out.

My father and I may not need to move if we give up Cable and stick just to Phone and Internet. That and buy from the cheapest grocery stores and shop at Wal-Mart for clothes (Their biggest normal size and smallest plus size is perfect for my body: Too fat for thin, too thin for fat, in a word, ambiguously-sized) and if we need to order online, find it at the lowest price! No more eating out unless it's my treat is another. Take the bus in the event the doctor needs to see me while he's at work and save if you want something that badly.

Thanks...(sips cold Ovaltine while listening to classical Beethoven and Vince Guaraldi-styled jazz music) I have survived abuse from those outside my family's circle of trust, I have survived numerous surgeries 100%, I have survived heartbreak and misery of men I love marrying other women or family members, either human or pet, dying of disease, I have even survived through numerous health issues that impeded my development as a human being.

This is merely a technical difficulty that can be adjusted to. My parents were on the rocks when my grandmother on dad's side (his mother) died from the degenerating properties of Parkinson's Disease. Dad coped terribly, with his alcohol addiction causing grief with my mom as she had dealt with alcoholic men in her life prior to meeting my father almost 30 years ago. I just felt remorse because I promised to my grandmother that I'd rush out to see her in her hour of need and I kept running out of money because life happened, so even if I was able, I still wouldn't have made enough money to be driven from Lynnwood, Washington to Princeton Junction, New Jersey. So, I didn't get to see her before the final goodbye...But she probably would have wanted it that way. She would have wanted me to remember her for her hospitality style, which was not unlike that of the "otomenashi" style from Japan, which roughly translated to "overshooting the guest's expectations of hospitality" and yes, she'd make rice a readily-available starch. She'd feed you until you begged to stop being fed.

Regardless, I must admit I'm getting over the fact that mom had secretly set a due date for dad to clean up his act. My mom went to a friend's wedding this past Saturday as of this post and dad wasn't sober by then. All I can do is be my father's rock when he can't be mine. I suffer from a food addiction, but to be fair, that's all I can think to do. I'm going to be 27 this October and I have to care for my father in his hours of need. Mom made me choose between her and dad. So I chose dad and I originally had chose dad in mind because I wasn't going to let him self-destruct. That and I had an obligation to help him in any other case besides emotional. He was the first person to cradle me in his arm and he was in his early 20s when he became a father. He swore to the justice that is fatherhood on that day 27 years ago. Now that I'm grown, I have the obligation as his child to care for him.

Sad that I had to choose between my parents, but my father needs me. Addict leading the addict, I guess you can call it. Be that as it may, my point is that I have a strong sense of justice for humanity. I vowed in life after surviving the harassment of my half-sister (who was recently excommunicated and has gone dark.), authority and peers, that I'd help those in need, no matter what trivial problem was upon them.

You poor soul. This situation scares me with your father because I'm not sure you can do anything to help him, but you are likely to be hurt by his behavior. I remember feeling very responsible for my parents when I was a kid. That feeling was reinforced by my siblings who took off and kept saying that, at least, I was there to take care of them. But it's not right. A kind adult kept telling me, until I got the message, that my parents were adults and could take care of themselves. Of course, she didn't see what was not working with them, but they were adults and they had made their choices.

I understand why you want to stay with him. You love him and you think you can help. But what if staying with him just makes it possible for him to continue his self-destructive behavior? And I know you're worried about money, too.... I wish you all the best with this situation. It's a difficult one.

I'm sure your grandmother would have understood.

Well, my parents are about to attempt to reconcile as my father and I missed my mother after a couple of days of days left to us.

My parents realized and confirmed that, in the essence of it all, I have a "daddy complex", going after men old enough to be my father. This was revealed when I was futzing with my smartphone, and they noticed I had a photo of Scott McNeil (voice actor, born 1962.09.15 and consider my mother was born 1962.10.30). My father asked "Is that your new boyfriend?" and my mother "Hmm?" and my father said "She kicked Bill Nye to the curb."

Then again, I guess "I've got more than 2 problems." But my mother tries to play up my flaws as a sign of human nature.

I hope it works out for them and you. Having your mother around does take some of the pressure off of you, at least. I'm hoping for the best scenario for you.

Do you feel that you have a "daddy complex" as they say? If you aren't getting what you need from your dad, I guess that could be a possible explanation.

Well, my mother has considered finding a third parent to care for me because I'm such a powerhouse in terms of energy and ideas.

My "daddy complex" started to form when my father started traveling for Microsoft when I was 10 and it was made solid when I was 12-13 and I was watching "Bill Nye the Science Guy" religiously on a network that no longer exists, especially when the "Heart" lesson would come on, my heart would beat a little fast as I'd see Dr. Nye, stripped down to shorts, getting a heart sonogram. My dad had been somewhat cold during my teen years, like he was not himself because he'd spend 14 days a month every month traveling. That and his constant absences made it hard to connect face-to-face.

I think it's more of I go after men old enough to pass for my father for romantic\sexual and pragmatic reasons. (I want an experienced man in my life and one that can help me in the event I need to be driven.)

So, if I WAS EVEN ABLE to bring Scott McNeil home, I would be met with some derision and turn red from both embarrassment and rage as my parents tell the embarrassing stories from my childhood. (I was the type of toddler who'd go streaking and, to add insult to injury, throw my dirty diaper in the wading pool. That's the most embarrassing of the bunch. Did I top your embarrassing toddler moment, everyone?)

In short, I need a third parent, even if I'm 27 and I admit that I do have a "daddy complex".

Today, I have to clean my room so a professional photographer can get the idea that my room is livable (It's a nightmare in reality.)

Tonight, mom's probably going back to where she was hiding.

"If I dream tonight, it may be of Scott holding me in his arms, whispering in Duo Maxwell's voice sweet words into my ears and I'd reply back as Maria Robotnik (during Sonic Adventure 2) as I am seated on the inside of his forearms (Duo Maxwell and Maria Robotnik were space colonists in their respective franchises. Besides, I have the ability to mimic the sickly girls and yes, Scott is roughly 13" taller than me, so carrying me would be needed instead of him stooping down.) Even if it was a crowded street in Seattle's winters, where rain is a constant, I'd listen as he'd carry me to the car and got me home to change out of my wet clothing. Once home and dry, I get to see him before he leaves to do work in the home studio I had set up for my work. I take my night pills and as I'm about to doze off, he takes a break to make sure I am warm, kissing me goodnight the way only a lover can."

But that's the nature of dreams: They defy the laws of the universe and are perfectly legal at last check.

The situation changed a little, because the plea bargain I made with my mother this morning will result in one of two things: (1) mom stays and we move to Marysville (two towns over) or (2) mom leaves and dad and I move to Marysville. I can only guarantee one or the other will happen, but I'm unsure which one.

My height for those wondering? I'm 5'3" and Scott is 6'4". So kissing is an inherent problem for a couple with one short partner and one tall partner. (Trust me, CMAR_nyc's height slider is a good way to explain this)

Still, I dumped Bill Nye in my mental world for Scott. I guess I find Scott a little more wild (long hair, muscular arms, piercings, dresses like a Kid Rock impersonator and with a job that requires speaking with vocal alteration, kissing is a default skill earned through the work he does.) and I can "train him like a dog" with donuts and ginger ale.

The fact I've been seeking excitement myself is obvious.

I never said I wanted to be THIS normal and be in a divorced family situation. The majority of my peers didn't have a choice. Neither do I except for the few I got to make regarding where to live and who to live with (I chose Marysville due to services and instead of two others: One filled with society's untouchables if you turn the wrong corner and the other had iffy to no services to help me) and I chose dad out of my commitment to him as an addict leading an addict. Besides, my father was the first person to hold me when I was first born. He made a commitment of justice that is fatherhood on that day 27 years ago. As his child, now grown, I have to help him right now!

After much reconciliation between my parents as the initiating talk for the separation was done when my father left rehab early and said the heartless "I don't want you in my life anymore" while detoxing. He sobered up to say it was just the wrong thing to say to your wife, one that affects your daughter in terms of what will happen to her. So, reconciliation completed, we're not going anywhere in terms of a family.

We're also not going anywhere in terms of moving. Due to our financial situation, we're stuck with the house and I have to pay my $250 a month to keep up with upkeep. Good thing, because my body needs inspection. I hope I don't have a tumor. My father thinks that's why I have migraines...

Either way, I'm staying...I'm the former New Jersey girl who is living in a Washington state world...and trust me, I'm the type who'd say "You gonna eat that" if you can't finish something I like eating too.