Yeah, I'm an adult child living with parents. I'm 24. I have a temp job now that finally pays well enough to move out, but will only last two months. I'm waiting for something permanent. That's what I tell everyone, but really, I don't have any friends (my one friend will be moving away soon) and I'd be desperately lonely without someone else in the house and I know I'd spiral into depression because of loneliness. My parents spoil me a lot, too, which has caused co-dependence. It's just comfy living here at home. I don't pay much towards the finances ($80/month), I just help out when random stuff pops up (a car breaks down and needs to go to shop, unexpected hospital bills, etc.) But those are really rare.
I have a really strong relationship with my mom, and a decently good one with my dad, and they've never made me feel bad for still living with them (I'm an only child, so that also plays into it, I'm sure).
Bumps have come along in the road. My mom battled alcoholism and while I had known it was an issue, it was just something I had put up with, thinking it was normal. Problems with it came up in my early 20s (20-21). Nights of sleep got interrupted as I'd have to help my mom get around the house. It was hard seeing my mom like that. The worst came when I first got sick, my mom caught what I had, and then got hit again with a rare strain of pneumonia. She became delirious, weak, and hostile (due to the deliriousness). It was a very scary moment in my life, and also the hardest moment in my life. I helped my dad out as best I could and he most likely appreciated having someone else there that was old enough to confide in and to help out with the situation. It was a very stressful time in my life (and his, too).
My mom remembered who people were, like me and dad, but refused to go to the hospital, thinking she was good. She was not okay at all and it was one of the hardest, worst things I've ever had to see in my life. Half a week later we called an ambulance (despite the high cost), but they couldn't take her because she refused, but could tell she needed immediate attention (apparently they can't force a ride if the person says no, sane or not). My mom is a large woman, so my dad and I couldn't lift her to take her ourselves despite the fact that she had stopped eating (at this point, she was like dead weight). Two days later, we finally tricked her into going to the "immediate care center," when in fact we were just going to take her to the ER. It took about an hour to an hour and a half (maybe even two) to get her from the bed to the car, as she was very delirious, weak, and also fighting us the entire way (ugh, it was very hard).
My dad took her so I didn't have to continue seeing her in her state (I had watched her through the days while he worked). I just worked on cleaning.
From what I heard, she was not happy to find herself at the hospital and fought the guys that helped bring her in (apparently at that hospital they have some emergency medical personnel that help in situations like this, where they'll help you get inside if the person is too weak, passed out, etc.)
She hated the hospital, but got much better. The CDC even got involved, wanting to know places she had been when it first started, because apparently there were only two cases of this pneumonia strain reported in the state (I think it was state, not the whole country). But APPARENTLY, what made it 100x worse was because she was a heavy drinker. She had suffered a lot of nerve damage around her knees area due to the alcohol over the years, which was why she couldn't walk or stand. Despite the pneumonia being what landed her in the hospital, her doctor could tell she was a heavy alcoholic and told her she needed to stop drinking or the nerve damage would just get worse. She had an intervention right there in the hospital for her drinking and she swore off all alcohol.
My mom got better and indeed swore off all alcohol. The idea that it had been that big of a problem really frightened her. She is SO MUCH better now and she doesn't have any of the problems she used to. The event did leave her a bit unsteady (the nerve damage wasn't full and she can walk, but she has problems with stairs now). Apparently my great-uncle had the same issue with alcohol, although he had never stopped drinking and it got a lot worse.
I didn't realize my mom was a serious alcoholic until all of that surfaced at the hospital. I guess when you live with it it is just considered "normal" to you, and not a problem when in fact it really is. Didn't help that my mom didn't have the typically displayed (in media, at least) mood swings or anger that comes along with it.
I was a college student at the time and lived at home, but if I lived on campus or outside the home, I probably would not have witnessed all that. I'm glad I got to help, but it was hard seeing her like that.
That was the biggest bump in the road, but other things have happened, too. Arguments between me and my dad due to not living up to his standard and me 'wasting my time away.' I had the cops called on me once that resolved pretty quickly (but parents, WHY?). Had to deal with judgmental extended family (that do love me in the end). Etc.
It's not always easy, but I prefer it over what I would assume would happen if I moved out. I'd be terribly lonely and then get depressed (and I've had depression before during college - I would like to NOT revisit that). My parents and I get along most of the time really and I love my dad's side of the family (even if they can be harsh critics). I've thought about finding a roommate online due to me not knowing people, but even that seems like it wouldn't be a good idea as I'd feel constantly judged by the other person. So for the time being, I'm looking for permanent work (well, not now, but will soon) while working at my seasonal job.
@Nymphetamine, that sounds like a rough life to me! I've had it pretty easy. The worst were some of my dad's old friends (which he had thankfully severed connections with years ago). Gotta love the "friend" that interrupts the family dinner (barged in through the front door and all) because my dad wouldn't buy his drugs. No gun, but it was a weird event to witness as a kid. To my knowledge, my parents didn't do hard drugs, just marijuana. My dad cut off all those connections and has focused all of his time/energy on his family. But that wasn't as an adult child. But I'm sure if my environment weren't nurturing and friendly (and safe!), I'd be out the door, too. Sort of feeds into my co-dependence though, really.
Sometimes I feel shame for still living at home, but not enough to move out.
Edited to add, because I didn't answer the main question: I'm lucky to have a supportive family. When issues come up, we all talk about it and come to what we feel is the best conclusion. Or we just talk it out period. Since I am an adult living at home, they know I have money to help out when needed, which is no problem, and they don't hide things from me. I don't really consult in anyone else, but other options may include talking it out with a good friend/relative and getting their advice (I give advice in situations like these, too). You want to find someone who knows you really well if it's a personal problem, or someone who can relate to the problem (like in your situation, perhaps extended family that you are close to that knows your parent really well, maybe? Depends on the severity of it, though). Difficult times are going to come up whether you still live at home with the parents or not, so try to remember that, too. And, as can be seen from the posts, everyone has a different life story (my advice probably wouldn't work for Nymphetamine, for example, as her family is completely different from mine, and her advice may not work best for you). Do what you think is best. I hope you can find someone to talk to about all of this and I hope it gets better for you, soon!
Resolving issues takes work, though, and sometimes it does take stepping out of your comfort zone to change things for the better. I'm terrible about this as I do love the comfort of home, but I wanted to get that out there as well, because sometimes changing has to be done aggressively. It's something I do not do well. I'm a very safe person. Haha