"Are you sure you're in the right profession?" - a Sim in my neighbourhood's technophobic monastery has 4 wants: Buy Computer Worth Over $2000, Buy TV, Buy Game Worth Over $5000 (the only one fitting the bill in my game being a bowling alley with bright lights), Buy Fire Alarm (also, the monastery has no spare money...)

"Dream on!" A Sim wants to go on holiday to a mountain destination that doesn't currently exist

"That's unusual!" Another Sim wants to see a ghost of a fellow dormie. Unusual because said dormie was a) friends and b) already dead at the time (usually only bitter enemies seem to get that want in my game...)

"I am not buying a car so stop rolling that want" when they roll wants to buy a car for a vacation home. I've had too many Sims get stuck in their cars returning to the vacation home to give them one.

"(censored) will you grow up already!" I hate when babies refuse to grow up for a certain adult and then end not growing up until after midnight for the other adult that gets home late from work.

I say a lot of "Get out of the way why are you in the way!" when a sims not suppose to be there for instance the bathroom
"Why does everyone has to go to the bathroom at the same time"
"PUT MY BABY DOWN"
"LEAVE THE BABY ALONE ITS SLEEPING"

Why are you picking the baby up? You want to hold him while he fills his diapers, but then continue to JUST STAND THERE while he screams!?
When I tell you NOT to make the bed why do you do it anyway?
Stop it! Stop! No stop it. STOP IT! stop it stop it stop it DAMNATION
You caused your super neat, serious child to pee himself because you were every so slightly dirty & I told you to wash your hands in the kitchen sink but NOOOOO you had to take a bubble bath you soapy whore you're having quads!
You're not minding; you never listen to me. You will all PAY!
And bedtime - what a stupid nightmare! By the time I've had everyone pee and get in the right bed it's 3am.. I thought there was a hack to make every one go to bed but can't find.

"Oh... d**n. And noooo! No no no no! I don't want you guys to have more kids!" (when playing the Burb family and John got alien abducted just as I about ready to send Lucy to college)

"Jennifer, stop poking your husband! He didn't cheat on you! At least I don't think he did..." After John first started showing signs of the alien baby, Jennifer went and poked him. I have a mod that makes a sim's spouse know it's not their child if certain criteria is met (never woohoo'ed, high logic, etc) and they get mad at the offending parties.

The things I scream at my sims are not very appropriate, ya feel?
Most of the time I just stare blankly and say, "Seriously?"
Other times I start angrily mumbling curse words at my sims.

I wish I could play </3

LOL, that's not fair. I'm sure he didn't ask to be abducted and 'probed'. XD

I'm not really the type of crazy to say things out loud to myself (I'm a different kind of crazy) but I do say a lot of things in my head whilst giving the proper facial expression. Some things that pop up more times than it should;

"Send home nanny."
"No, don't chat, send her home."
"I TOLD YOU TO SEND HER AWAY!"
"I guess playing in the bathtub is the reasonable thing to do for an elderly."
"So after work, I sent you to clean the kitchen, have a bath, make dinner and feed the cat. I suppose looking at the rain and forgetting all that is way more important. Also the cat is dying."
"Yeah. Haha. No. You're not doing that."
"And here I thought you could take care of yourself for 5 seconds but instead you're dying at the piano."
"Oh and you decided to perform while you're at it. Great. You live alone."

I'm a control freak in sims gameplay so there's a lot more painful moments that I can't think of right now.

"Get out now before she comes in! Come on, move! Move! Oh, drat. I really have to remodel that restroom."

"Mommy and daddy are busy making you a new sibling, they'll cheer for your A+ later."
"This bathroom is occupied, ladies and gents. That means, "Get the eff OUT!"
"I couldn't care less that you haven't had fun in a week, go to work and suck it up."
"This flu really is the plague in disguise."
"I've been buildin' on the Sims, 2, All the live long day! Yes, I've been buildin' on the Sims, 2, just to pass the time away. Don'cha hear the world callin'? Rise up so early in the morn'? Don't you hear your boss-a callin'? "Get your ass to work!"

"Was I talking to a wall?!" Said this recently when a sim got didn't do what I ask them to do.

"Fuck me!.... really?"

I love this game and the unexpected stuff that still happens after all these years.

"I think you need to see a doctor". Said after yet another Sim does an anatomically-impossible massage. Most recent variation I've seen involves having one arm go through the other arm (and body) while massaging the boyfriend's left shoulder only. Boyfriend didn't seem to care.

Bipolar Sim much? Mood-swings?

Now, if I were to repeat the litany of "colorful" words I'd say when I get the lovely 'The game has terminated. The application has crashed' message I'd make even MattShizzle blush if he was still around this forum, and probably break a few rules of conduct.

My mom is usually sitting by me when I play The Sims, since my laptop is in the dining room. I have ACR, and my Sims are always banging. D:

1. "Stop banging already! You already have three kids!"
2. "I need a boy dog to make puppies."
3. "I must have all the babies!"
4. "I will ruin your lives."
5. "Stop *%#$S staring at me!"

I routinely curse out my Sims for various infractions, often route-blocking or queue dropping. Most of the things I say to them would not be suitable for mixed company.

Y'all are so tense. I hardly ever swear at them. The cat who insists on walking back and forth in front of the monitor at crucial points is another matter.

"Seriously? That's what you want? Okay, don't blame me when it goes kerflooey."
"Yes, you, who else is there?"
"Okay, honey, go get him! Sorry it took so long."
"No, you don't have to go to class, your bar is full!"
"Don't bother rolling term paper wants. There's no point till you get that last skill. Let's send you to a community lot and see if you can roll a want for that last skill."

"Phew! I didn't accidentally mod that out after all!" - Said after I saw my first burgular in SimHampton since 2006. Montagna Valgomisura may have had a different opinion of the matter, even if the burgular ran away without stealing anything (I have a mod that allows burgulars to be fought, and this one must have though defeating Montagna was sufficiently satisfying without stealing anything as well).

Oh yeah, this. "Can you please get your butt out of my face. Tess! I'm really busy right now. I don't want you on my lap. I can't see the screen ... Will you please go and sleep in the dog bed." XD

As for sim cats. "Will you *censored* stop crying because you can't get on the counter. It's driving me insane! You aren't supposed to be able to get on this counter. Go climb on one of the many other ones that you can sit on and leave this one alone!" I had to put items on all my inaccessible counters to stop the annoyance.

"NO! YOU DO NOT ROLL WANT TO SEE THE GHOST OF DAVID FIN (Sim I made,) BECOME A PLANTSIM (I got seasons a while ago, better add that,) OR MET ONE! I GOT YOU THE ALIEN ABDUCTION ASPRATION BENEFIT. (Knowledge sim duh!)

Charity, be glad I didn't have the coding of pets. I would totally have lobbied for and tried to give them the capacity to jump onto occupied surfaces and knock things to the floor!

Help! I'm downloading and I CAN'T STOP!

"Fine, go ahead and get in the hot-tub...even though you are about to die of starvation."

Stupidity (and lack of food...even though the butler had already prepared a meal) almost cost this Sim their life (had to intervene). Always playing with 'Free Will On', is truly interesting.

I've said the "F-Word" plenty of times.

Also, "Stupid machine!" when something is borked, froze up, or isn't working right (sometimes with the F-Word in the middle)

JUST HAPPENED in my game:

"What the heck?! NO! I clicked on WOOHOO, not TRY FOR BABY! My INTENTIONS were for you and your boyfriend to graduate COLLEGE and have kids AFTERWARDS, since you guys BOTH have the Knowledge aspiration, but NO! You just HAD to get pregnant when you guys were both TEENS! NOOOOO!!!!"

...And what's worse is that I don't even HAVE the "Risky WooHoo" mod Seriously, I'm pretty darn sure I pressed the WooHoo button and not the Try For Baby button! What the heck! :P

*sighs* Oh well, at least "My Biological Clock" (y'know, with inTeenimater) has an option to "End My Pregnancy"

P.S. The Sims I had this happen with are Scout Alvarez and Leigh McDowell.

Do you have ACR? If you do, there's an option that occasionally (percentage varies by aspiration, personality, marital status, and age, and is visible in the "view token" option from the adjuster) swaps TFB for WooHoo, with normal TFB success rates (although I think InTeen slowly lowers them with age). However, the default is for married couples only, and the override has to be applied on the adjuster for each lot -- not something that's easy to do accidentally! I've got the override on on all lots, so everyone can autonomously TFB...and they do. I caught Nina Caliente in the act with Mortimer Goth (thankfully no lullaby, as Dina's already pregnant by him!) and it resulted in a lullaby when desperate-for-a-baby Cassandra Goth seduced Lazlo Curious (she and Don are married, but not on speaking terms due to his behavior). Personally, I like that sort of thing...adds to the soap-opera feel.

As for what I say, here's one: "Ugh, stupid drama professor...he's married, leave him alone...stupid cow, she's his wife, leave her alone too...go flirt with each other, you nuisances!"

ACR also reduces fertility by age for the ACR interactions. And has risky woohoo.

"No! Not in the middle of your toddler's first birthday party!!"

What were they doing? Getting started on the next baby. XD

Yes. And they do it every single time, since I have ACR...

Nah I don't have it :P

Since I've been using ACR, for some reason, my Sims seemed to want to kiss or hop into bed with the Unsavory Charlatan. I can assure you that's the LAST thing I would want. I am quite aware that any sort of romantic encounter with him can bork my game.

Now, when I enter a community lot, the very first thing I do is to generate the visitor controller and make sure he's still banned, along with Mrs. C and anyone else who might cause my game to go belly-up. But in the beginning, he slipped on there before I check on a new Community lot.

My interior dialogue went like this:

"Oh, my Sim can do a bit of socializing ... Wait! Is that the Unsavory Charlatan? Ban him! Ban him! And you, my Sim ... get the hay-ell off that lot in case I don't get to him fast enough! I don't care if you need a break. Leave. NOW!"

(I am also quite aware that under no circumstances should I select him and see if he got into any mischief. I managed to catch him just as he stepped onto the lot, but before anyone got any romantic notions ... knock wood. As far as I'm concerned, he's perma-banned. On ANY lot. Can't take even a chance that a Sim might kiss him.)

Hopefully, he is perma-banned now, anyway. For some reason, the first couple of times, the perma-banning didn't take effect. Perhaps because I got my Sim off the lot before the game registered the ban! (EDIT ... I stupidly realized that I have to generate the Visitor Controller to ban him on every bleepin' Community Lot, including the Uni lots, it seems, and Vacation Lot. Every ... bleepin' ... one! Must have missed a couple. Still, the effort will be worth it if I can keep him away from temptation ... or my Sims from temptation, for that matter.)

Needless to say that I'm very, very careful using ACR or ACR-related mods on any vacation lots. At all. Can't be too careful when I have a horny Sim on vacation.

"No, Don, the baby goes in the CRIB, not the FLOOR."
"Tara, he's had enough smartmilk. KNOCK IT OFF."
"Carlos, bring that newspaper back here!"
"Alex, just TWIRL and free your spawn from the plumbbob!"

I'd go with "Bloopers and funny sims pics" on the picture thread. Um - why exactly did you put a flamethrower under the commode?

For when they eat chilli!

At least do us the favor of putting your pictures (which aren't showing, by the way) into spoiler tags.

I hope that's not weird, but instead of talking to sims I have them talk to each other in the game. I'm not acting it out aloud, of course. And sometimes it's funny.

One toddler sim grew up and instantly desired to learn to do homework. But the problem was... he hasn't been to school yet and had no homework!

Kid: Daddy, teach me to do homework!!!
Dad: But you have no homework. Wait till tomorrow.
Kid: Then let's do my sister's homework! Here it is on the floor!

And they do it while she sleeps. It must be not a coincidence that the child's one true hobby is science.

"No! Bad Goopy! Bad!" whenever Goopy Gilscarbo tries to ACR woohoo during a date.

Woops, I moved the pics...dam why do I keep doing that.
WHY? Well just to make a funny picture "roasting marshmallows".

I could fix/hid pics, but think it would be better to delete entry...yes?

"WHY did you just noogie her in the middle of your date?!"
(Sheesh, you blink and they're getting themselves in trouble!)

Don L
 

why the heck you keep following the maid in and out the bathroom Don L your wife of 3+ yrs. and 4 kids ,sure would love 2 know. Well actually Cassandra knows your a player .
So you big JERK just make sure she cleans up both your nasty spills before I have to pay the tramp

"Why are you saying "See you later"? You live in this dorm!" Facepalm-worthy moment courtesy of dormie Skylar Hunicke, who then turned up at 7 am next morning and knocked on the dorm's front door as if he was a drama professor...

"All right, Pascal, go feed your baby, then go to work - OH MY GOODNESS, THE SKY'S BEEN LITTERED WITH STRANGE TEXTURE GLITCHES! *quick option reset later* All right, now that's all good and done - OH, ARE YOU KIDDING ME? THE GROUND OF STRANGETOWN IS NOW A STRAGE MIX OF BLUE, BLACK, AND GREEN! GREEEEEEEEEEEEN! *whispers* this is what you get with an Intel integrated chip..."

"OK, this house looks fine! It has room for 5 Sims in total, there's a nice swing and a willow for shade, and it looks all nice and quaint! I wonder if MTS'd accept it - you're kidding me. There was a TINY little crater at the edge of the lot that I neglected to find? Options.. quit.. yes."

More like what I think to myself loudly while playing The Sims 2...

I took my time to make a family, and i had them in the house.

Sadly, i was doing renovations and forgot to add the new front door nor a fire alarm. They were cooking and burned to death.


I was VERY angry.

When an old man starts flirting with a teen (Happens a lot to me... Anyone else?): "Hahahahaha No... Just No..."
When fire people come out and they moan there's no fire, when there is: "Hey, you, yes fireman, person with no eyes, look next to you, the fire's right there, to your left, a bit more, yeah, thanks for the fine, i'll just let my sims die in a fire!"

No, it doesn't usually happen. It can only happen if you've added mods to make it happen, in which case you can hardly complain.

She can't complain but sometimes she still does...Life's been good to her so far.

Anyway: "Twins?! In a two-bedroom apartment? Oh, boy."
"Trent? Why didn't you change that diaper like I told you to?"
"Oh, no, you are not going to the playground with the baby hollering."
"Yes, I'm sending them out without you. Just thank your stars I don't have Community Lot Time."
"O my squeee, he's trying to eat his foot!" (I haven't had the baby dangle very long, y'all.)

"What the fuck are you DOING?!"
"NO"
"Oh fuck right off"
"I SAID TALK TO YOUR DAD HE'S GONNA DIE IN 3 DAYS STOP READING BOOKS"
"STOP DOING THAT OR I'LL MURDER THIS WHOLE FAMILY"
"URGHHHhsahdhhAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"

"Yes, the baby stinks. Now go change it!"
"Why are you taking the baby to the bathtub? Just change its diaper!"
" Don't jerk off; you're not even in your own house!"
" Don't have sex now, your kid is in the room"
" You have to pee/ you're hungry/ you're sleepy? Then pee/eat/go to bed and stop bitching!"
" What idiot thought making hedges grow was a good idea!?"
" When did you get pregnant!? You have a kid in college, it is too late for that!"
" Why would you reject your baby like that? He only wants love"

"Why are you going to bed? You need food, and I didn't think you were Jasmine Tai's unknown sister" - Said to a Sim who was starving to death and not that tired, but decided to go to bed anyway. (The late Jasmine Tai is best known in SimHampton for attempting to eat a two-square-sized fire outside her dorm and failing).

OMG yes! The flu is a plague! I swear. One of my sims got the flu. Then the whole family caught it. Then in another household, one of my sick sims visited the lot and infected a whole family before I realized it. Then ANOTHER sim ended up at a party my sim was hosting and infected the family and the other guests!

My quotes as the majority of my neighborhood was infected?

"What are you doing? No! NO! Don't hug him goodbye!"
"Oh my God. You're preggers with the freakin flu!"
"Who'd you bring home? Huh? CRAP! Send home, dad! Send the brat home! Awesome." *Watches parent send sick!child home.* *Message pops up* "WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU CAUGHT THE FLU?!"
"Right if you're sick, I need to isolate you." *Sick sim stands up from table to leave as another sim sits down* *Message pops up* "OMG! I HATE YOU! How do you make him sick by sitting AT THE SAME TABLE!"
"You have the flu? WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON HIS COMMUNITY LOT? NO, DON'T KISS HIM!"

It wasn't a restful time for me.

"where are you going???? the cab is on its way.....ok, ok, you need to use the restroom"
"where are you----I thought you were in the restroom...cab is here-----who are you talking to now??? and why didn't you use the restroom like you said you were?"
"you will just have to hold it till you get home now"

yes all this in just a matter of less then a minute---and yes he made it home with plenty of time to go to the bathroom

Usually, I'm quiet when on the computer, so I don't shout at the computer.

(The quiet part comes from years of living in the bottom floor of a custom built 3-story house with an atrium that housed a "monstera deliciosa" plant until we sent it to University of Washington to have the botany nerds study it. I lived on the bottom floor and you had to enter through the top floor via a deck and go down two flights of stairs, four if you counted the landings in between. Because the atrium was connect to all three floors, you had to be quiet if you were to let my parents sleep during late night gaming sessions.)

My phrases:
"Mr. Lothario, had it ever occurred to you that by the priest's line '...and forsaking all others...' that you have to give up your bachelor lifestyle?!"
"I never knew that giant gyroscope could make you puke."
"What? The social worker can take away my kids if they get overheated?" (This happened during a gameplay session with the Seasons Expansion Pack. I got the kids to cool down after I got that social worker warning.)

Monstera Deliciosa? Sounds like a cow plant. XD

Actually, monstera deliciosa was a palm-tree shaped plant that produced some kind of fruit, but granted, we never harvested from it.

No, I'm pretty sure the botany nerd population is still the same as it was 10 years ago when we donated it.

"Don't do it Jack. He's not right for you. You'll only get hurt."

To my gay romance Sim Jack Gill, when he told me he wanted to flirt with Tybalt Capp.

Well, now that mention it, I start thinking of the things I yell at my sims...

1) "Gordon you idiotical being!!! SHE"S A MAN EATER!!!"

2)"Haha, you really are a dumb sim aren't you? * the sim starts crying* Oh NO I didn't mean it! It just slipped!" (now the trick was to get him to stop crying)

(I'd say this is the most common one) 3)"But you just had a kid, now you want more? *five seconds later* Here you happy?
*Then the kid grows up into a toddler* Oh no, another one? But you already have 15 kids!!! What wrong with you?? Oh Fine...
(some time later) But you already have 22 kids, are you ever gonna stop with the want??!!!" (then later they go on holiday)
and she fears having kids.... lol

4)"Pathetic dancing sim, I know, it runs through their family... "

5) (The repo man pays a visit...) "But I don't own anything, can't you see the sim's lot is empty?"

6) (The sim got struck by lightning) "I DON'T believe you just survived that, ok, call in your father and see if he gets struck by lightning too! (it's my favorite memory)

7) "Why on earth did you just stand up in the pool just to notice you didn't have any clothes on?"

8) "Why are your eyeballs pure white?? Are you looking at your brain? Did you just see your thoughts flash before your eyes?

9) "WHAT ON EARTH??? Your invisible! Is this what happens when you come back from work? Now I can only tell where you are if I search for a very small wedding ring
hovering in mid-air!"

10) "Quit looking at me!" (when I hover the mouse over him)

11) "I'm not suprised you get promoted everyday...."

And yeah, I can't really remember other times I said something to the sim, and it ended up being funny! ;D

Hah! Oh man, that sounds exactly like what happened when I first said the flu was the plague the first time.

"Were those baby chimes? Those best not have been baby chimes. *pregnancy checker* Hey, simmie? Screw you too. You're messin' with my plans!"

Only a week? But of course my rotations are so long that even a single rotation of flu feels much longer. Which is why you sometimes hear me shouting: "No! No! Get away from those bugs!"

Three or four weeks per family. So I'd go: Broke, Pleasant, Lothario, Caliente, Dreamer, Jackson, play each through a week, go back and start over. Every time someone was cured, there was *inevitably* something that had them catch the flu again, whether it was from within the family or family guests. ><

That's not hard to prevent. Cure all household members, so they don't keep passing it back and forth, and don't allow any visitors, for any reason, until everyone is well.

Also, don't change the lot until all Sims on the lot are cured. Otherwise it'll get passed on in the background of community lot visits or when a flu-ridden Sim is inevitably invited home from work or school.

Thanks guys, next time I have an outbreak I'll use these methods for myself. It was my first time ever playing on a rotation so I was overwhelmed relatively quickly. (I used to play one household into oblivion until it bored me and then move on.)

Since I've only recently returned to Sims 2 (I like Sims 3 as well, except for some frustrations) I find myself saying, "Oh, right! I forgot about that." Then I will either laugh or feel all "mushee-eyed" (ya, love my Sims.)

"Oh, for crying out - She's not hungry, she's stinky, can't you - oh! Sharla! You're my hero!"

Teen Sharla was visiting a house with infant twins when they went into their synchronized diaper-filling routine, and only one household member was available to change diapers. So while Dad carried Twin 1 to the changing table, Sharla got Twin 2 out of her bouncy chair and headed for the kitchen. I of course assumed she was getting the kid a bottle, but nope - she popped her into the sink and washed her!

And this, ladies and gentlemen, is why you should invite people over when you're swamped with child care!

"Fine then, pee on the floor since you won't leave the (censored) baby alone." In Tarlia's cleaned Strangetown she made Jenny Smith younger so she isn't in the pregnancy cut off and of course she tries for baby and gets pregnant. The above quote is from the fact that her hunger/bladder/energy was low and instead of taking care of those needs she had to go play with the baby. I normally don't mind when Sims autonomously play with the baby, but I don't want them to starve to death because they just had to play with the baby instead of eating. (I was dealing with the frigging cat that Jill and Pollination Tech #9 just had to have, so I wasn't paying attention to Jenny until she was already holding the baby.)

"The Toilet is just a few steps away! Put the baby down and do your business! Ok, fine, pee on the floor, stupid."

To kids/teens who choose to do their homework on the floor:
- I GAVE YOU A BLOODY DESK AND YOU DO HOMEWORK ON THE FLOOR?! DO YOU KNOW HOW TIRESOME IT IS FOR ME TO HAVE TO GRAB YOUR HOMEWORK ONTO THE DESK?!

Sims who own a home business:
- CUSTOMERS ARE COMING! GET MY A** OUT OF BED AND SELL SELL SELL!!!!!

Dining out:
- WAITER! I'M F***ING WAITING TO ORDER! STOP WIPING THE F**** OUT OF THAT DAMN GLASS AND GET THE HELL OVER HERE!! NOW!!!

Kids sleeping in parent's bed when tired:
- STOP SLEEPING IN YOUR PARENT'S BED!!!!

Parents' sleeping in their kid's beds:
- STOP SLEEPING IN YOUR SON'S/DAUGHTER'S BED!!!!

Wanting sims(not car owner) to carpool to work by private car:
- YOU WANT TO TAKE THE SMOOGO?! I JUST GAVE YOU A F****NG LAND ROVER!!!!

Fortune sims' wanting a more expensive TV:
- WHY WOULD YOU WANT A NEW FLAT SCREEN TV?! THEY'RE EXPENSIVE, FUN BOOST IS SLOW & BIG BROTHER MIGHT BE WATCHING YOU SIM!!!

Customers' barging into kitchen/dining room:
- DON'T EAT MY FOOD, CUSTOMERS!!

Sims' stuffing face when hungry:
- STOP STUFFING YOU FACE!!!

Sim not training their toddler:
- HEY, I TOLD YOU TO POTTY TRAIN/TEACH TO TALK & WALK, NOT FEED HIM!!!!

When ACR is on, and two married sims suddenly stop what they're doing and start heading in the direction of their bedroom: "Uh huh. Don't think I don't know where you're headed."

Oh I know. Happens with Goopy and my born-in-game Pleasure sim. Happened a LOT during their honeymoon. I tend to make them wait for woohoo until they roll the wants, so when that happens I'm like "NO! BAD GOOPY! BAD!"

"Where are you off to? You need to change the diapers on the triplets! No, don't go to the bed! No! Cancel, cancel cancel! Oh. Great. Such a family sim, don't care for the children you already have, fiiiiine." *sigh*

"Do dormies have brains of their own, or do they have one of those Emergency Inflatable Brains I saw in an online shop this morning?" - the 4th dormie in Lochside Luxaire Dorm dies during Allegra Gorey's university career (and she's still a junior). Granted, LLD is strictly self-catering, but there was some perfectly good chilli con carne on the dining room table...

(On second thoughts, maybe she was a vegetarian...)

"You are so cute." (To Ripp Grunt, who is actually discovering his sexuality in a reasonably realistic way, and his townie high-school sweetheart Daniel Grey, who is just a sweetie.)

Extensive quotes from Romeo and Juliet whenever the Montys and/or Capps do something appalling, whether directed to by me or not. What can I say, I'm a Shakespeare nerd.

Just the other day:

"I still have no idea why you use the back door instead of the fro--wait, is that tree on fire? Oh crap. NO. DON'T GO NEAR THE TREE. NO, STOP, YOU NEED TO GO TO WORK. OR AT LEAST CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT. CANCEL. CANCEL. ABORT! Oh, great, now you're on fire. Way to go. This is what you get for not using the front door even though I placed it last. Mhm. Yeah. Now you're dead. You better hope your brother can resurrect you..."

One successful resurrection later...

"Demoted because of a chance card. Man, that sucks. Death by fire, and now this? Tough luck, dude. Okay, yeah, go make yourself some food to cheer yourself up...

...DID YOU REALLY SET THE KITCHEN ON FIRE?? YOU HAVE SEVEN COOKING SKILL POINTS, MAN. Criminy, CALL. THE. FIRE. DEPARTMENT. No, STOP FLAILING. STOP, YOU'RE GONNA... Dammit. I hope your epitaph reads 'dumbest sim to ever live'."

Meanwhile, his brother is head of the SCIA and in a love octagon with half the neighborhood. There was some kind of bad distribution of luck in that family...

You're the one didn't give him a fire alarm, dude.

Check the description for the door. Some of them are actually described as interior doors, and if you use them for the front door, they won't be recognized.

The house has one of those hoods for the stove that I *thought* functioned as a fire alarm, like one of the other ones I have does, but it turned out to be just a decorative piece. That got corrected really quickly, but only after he bit it... which was probably a merciful death by that point, considering.

As for the doors... huh. That actually might be it, because his brother never uses the front door either. I'll have to swap it out and see if that fixes the fascination with the back door. Thanks for the info!

Edit: It was an interior door. Lesson learned: pay more attention when building.

It's best to get either a fire alarm or a sprinkler, because otherwise your sims' queues will be stomped so they can moth the fire like idiots and get burned.

"Oi! Don't take my baby!!!" (when a random sims comes into the house and steals the baby from the crib.
"Who the hell are you???" (random sim in house again)
"GO AWAY!!! Stop waking up my sims!" (random ghost sim in my house)

This came a couple days ago:

I have MogHughson's Apartments and Shopping mod. It's wonderful, but my sims can be annoying every once in a while.
*Watches sim try to serve food in restaurant instead of the table next to the stove.*

"That's it! You stupid sim! I've had it! I SHALL SMITE YOU! I HAVE THE DOWNLOAD TO DO IT!"

WHY would you come into this room just to turn on the TV/Radio/Play SSX...can't you see that the children are TRYING TO SLEEP?!

No, you may not play loud obnoxious computer games for seven hours.

Wow a freaking teddy bear is in your way, let's stand there and wave our arms about while shouting like a moron instead of stepping around it. -_-

ARE YOU STUPID?! and WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT?!

I know you two don't get along and you have an X on the lightening bolt but guess what you're marrying him anyway.

Why aren't you going to sleep? Oh there's a radio on in the room.

Since Sims seem to be too stupid to realize another Sim is sleeping, I never put noise making things (computer, TV, radios etc) in bedrooms. Some Sim looking for fun will inevitably turn on the TV/computer game if its in a bedroom and wake up the other Sim because they want fun not caring that the other Sim is asleep. That is also why I edit hotel rooms to remove the TVs because one Sim will be trying to sleep and the other Sim just has to turn on the hotel TV and wake up the sleeping Sim.

What annoys me is that the Sims 3 computer games are much louder than the one in Sims 2.

"Leave the cat alone and get on the bus" Buck Grunt really wanted a kitten so I got it for him, and kept autonomously playing with it when the school bus showed up.

I didn't know the computer woke people up! But I did find out the rat (hamster?) keeps people awake - just like real life! Speaking of which, I thought they could bite sims, even make them sick, but I've never had it happen.

That was TS1. The guinea pig could kill sims. XD

Oh God, that's kinda embarassing... Once I was playing Sims 1, and social worker came to take baby from pretty unfair reasons: baby was taken care of, but was bugged in some way. I was enraged, since my Sims lost work and had to really, really work hard to take care of the baby. No hacks usage not anything would work, so in fit of rage I made my sim "think about fire" with SimWardrobe item and I said out loud...
"B*ch, I will burn alive you and the baby"
My sister heard me. She is making fun of me for saying this to this day.

My most recent :
"Okaaaaaayyyy...."
"You SUCK at running a store! You don't just start jumping rope in the middle of the store when people are trying to shop!"
"Alrighty then..."
"Well, I didn't plan for you to be gay, but why not?"

All of this to the same sim in a new hood where characters from two different book series were thrown together...

"PUT THAT BABY DOWN!"

"Don't you dare eat that moldy spaghetti!"

"Oh my gosh stop crying that Grandma died and just finish your homework."

"Get back inside you nut!"

"Why are you jumping on the bed at a time like this?!"

"The bush is seriously RIGHT THERE! Just trim it! It's not that hard! Walk around the other one!"

"Stop turning on the radio! Your child is napping! Nobody wants to see you dance! IF YOU DO IT ONE MORE TIME I'M SELLING YOUR RADIO!"

"FOUR DAYS! You're becoming elders in FOUR DAYS!! YOU'RE NOT HAVING ANOTHER FREAKIN' BABY!!!"

"WHY'D YOU GET SPRAYED BY A FREAKIN' SKUNK?!"

"Why is the baby outside?"

"Please let that poor baby get some sleep ... You've fed him enough, he's full. PUT HIM DOWN NOW!"
"Look, there's a bed right next to you. You're tired, so be a good sim and go to sleep." *collapses from exhaustion*
"You just had to put that baby down on the floor. In the middle of the nursery. Good. Now everybody's awake and crying. You genius." >.>

"What are you doing?! You're not supposed to play fetch with the stray dogs outside! GET BACK INSIDE AND WATCH TV!!"
"Wow, thank you ACR! Now, my Sims are autonomously caressing and WooHoo-ing on the couch a lot! AND Linda's pregnant!"
"So...Linda prefers to be in her undies while her husband George prefers to be in his everyday wear? The fuck?"

(I just installed ACR...hmm. It could come in handy...I guess...)

Have any of you see Reservoir Dogs or Goodfellas lately? I've cursed more than enough for both of those movies in a stretch of one day of play.

"If it makes you feel better..." Desdemona Capp has a queue item to cough on an lightning-caused fire. Luckily, she was too busy having a coughing fit on the other side of the lot to do the queue action before the fire petered out.

@ Eiszimmer , I usually sound like Calamity Jane in Deadwood when I play. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kKEZbgaqJWo

"Leave the baby alone and go to work." Hannah Bell just had to feed the baby (they had a born in game daughter) right when her carpool pulled up. It took several cancels to finally get her to put the baby in the crib and go to the carpool. Issac fed her a little later.

"Argh ACR knock it off" again Hannah Bell almost missed her carpool because she was ACR flirting with Issac.

"Hurry up (censored)" Marcel and Sophia Jocque just had to start ACR woohooing on the couch right when Sophia's carpool pulled up.

"GAHHHH WHY DO MY SIMS KEEP ON HAVING BOYS?!" < - Even when they're adopting; it's insane I tell you

And what makes it worse is that I have soooo many cute little outfits for baby girls and when my Sim has yet another boy it's like, "WELL WHAT'S THE POINT IN HAVING ALL THESE THEN?!" :P

"Awww...they're engaged!"

"Give me a (censored) break game, I'm waiting for the taxi" There wasn't enough room on the Contrary lot to build a driveway so Rick had to wait for the taxi to pick him up for his date with Violet and while I was waiting for the taxi I got the message from the game to hurry up or he would stand Violet up

"Go damnit GO!" when the taxi finally showed up and Rick got in, the Taxi just sat there, I didn't want Rick to stand Violet up. He finally did get downtown and managed not to stand Violet up.

"Work with me here you two" Rick had the want to go steady with Violet which is why I did the date in the first place, but the two teens headed for the chess board instead of letting me have him propose going steady. I had to turn free will off to get them to finally go steady.

Edit to add: I'm having the opposite problem other than one boy, all the born in game children are girls.

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I play sims over at my friends house, so we decide what the sims do as a group.....and a certain household we usually play..well, its 2 now because of new sims added in......and well, these are ohrases from my friends and me, because we play sims2 as a group....its surprisingly fun, and the weird phrases are:
"STOP LEAVING THE BABY IN FRONT OF THE FRIDGE...."
"Why do all my sims kids have their dads eyecolor..its WEIRD!"
"You want ANOTHER kid?"
"Stop Making out and do something PRODUCTIVE...like paying THE BILLS!"
"WHY ARE YOU (insert sim name) IN YOUR UNDERWEAR?!?!?"
"SOOOO....his lifetime want is *looks at lifetime want*.....TO BECOME A MAD SCIENTIST....*friend burst out laughing*
"STOP MAKING OUT....go do something else"
"DONT DO THAT.....your kid is watching you.....thats not right"
also we had this one sim.....who kept taking care of another sims kid.....we'd yell at the screen because he kept taking care of the kid....and we had some other sims that.....wouldnt leave eachother alone....literally....there was a funny moment when we made the sims we were playing go to college.....there was a sim couple who wanted to woohoo in a tub....there was another sim already IN the hot-tub...we thought he'd get out....he didnt.....so the si -couple woohood...and even in the scene....he was just sitting there...looking unamused while the other two were...well..woohoo-ing....I swear it was creepy and funny at the same time!

I've had the baby thing happen a lot too...only it'd be (insert Nobless character name )...seriously....this one sim kept leaving his kids in front of the fridge...EVERY TIME