Rule 32525248 of dating: You will ALWAYS go out and meet a nice guy right before your boss slaps a huge, time consuming project on your desk. Never when you felt that you had far too much time to yourself and thought that buying a cat would provide necessary time filling.
brrrrrrrrriiinnggggg
"Hello," i picked up the phone on Monday night, welcoming the distraction from paperwork
"Cherline! Hi! It's Trent! From the bar on Friday? You gave me your number" a nervous voice came down the line
Oh god and he actually CALLS! What is this?!
“Oh…er….hi..”
I’m a bit of a minx, obviously.
“Look, I was wondering…I had a really good time with you. Could I take you out for a drink…or maybe some dinner?” he stuttered
“Erm…that sounds nice but I’m not really…available for that”
“Is it because I’m not hot enough?” he laughed
“What? No! I’m just…busy with work and things” I stammered
“You don’t eat or drink when you have work to do?”
“No, I don’t. I have to go now.”
click.
My god what is WRONG with me? A nice, attractive guy wants to take me out and I totally shut him down. Maybe I am scared? Or a workaholic? Or a crazy cat lady? He’ll probably never call again and I’ll wind up with a balding investment banker who makes me feel secure and comfortable but isnt the least bit sexy or adventurous.
Rule 46486 of dating: When you’re fairly sure he’s going to call, he won’t. When you think you’ve scared him off he will persist and leave 34 very sweet messages on your answering machine over the course of only a week, making you wonder whether maybe it would be nice to let him take you on a date. He will then will call at eight on a Friday and ask you to pop down to the bar for a quick drink, leaving you to hurriedly think up an excuse rather than admitting that you are already in pyjamas and ready for bed when most women are just popping the cork on a bottle of champagne.
Stupid insane week at work.
“Ah well…that actually sounds nice but…I work very early tomorrow morning and I was just about to go to bed”
“You work on a Saturday? That’s interesting,” I could hear his smirk through the phone
“Why is that interesting? Lots of people work on Saturday”
“Yes but I live fairly close to your office and I could have sworn it’s usually shut on the weekend”
“Oh…no…they just like to…save electricity,” I mentally slapped myself in the face. I am the original moron.
“Right. Of course. What about dinner after your busy weekend shift then?”
SERIOUSLY? Where are all the suave don’t-care attitude blokes?
“Why on earth are you so desperate to take me out?” I wailed, exasperated
“Because you’re beautiful, and even though you probably don’t remember because you were a bit drunk, you’re also very funny and interesting and I want to get to know you better”
Wow
“Geez. Ok then, I guess. But just a friendly dinner, don’t think that this pushy calling-every-day thing is going to work for you”
“I wouldn’t dream of it”
SO. It turns out I have a date and am entering the real adult world. Crap.