We all suffer from different forms of fear and anxiety:

For me, since 2017, I started on a Health Care Odyssey of getting better like losing the excess 200 pounds from years of eating like a teenage linebacker (most of it was spurred by a number of medicines the doctors neglected to address weight gain was a serious side effect. My mother still kicks herself for that.).

Not to mention work on restoring my vitamin and mineral levels and restore what has been damaged over the years.

But this preface is to explain my fear. On July 30th, I have a sedation dentistry operation as I have kicked, jumped, bit and scratched and even chokeheld dentists and their technicians because laughing gas alone didn't work to keep me calm.

It's the operation. Last time, the intubation tube scratched up my throat that I lost full gravity and sound of my voice, rendering me mute as Ariel after the exchange in Ursula's Coven in Disney's The Little Mermaid. Took a drink of Shasta diet ginger ale (I rather risk it with HFCS) and I gained some of my voice back.

The last time the scratch happened, it took 30 minutes to call for a drink and my throat burned temporarily as I regained my voice.

It technically is the totality of the operation: get up at what we call buttcrack o'clock, get admitted, changed into the gown, get checked for a pregnancy test (I'm not seeing any one IRL), get wheeled to surgery by the orderlies, some of which compete in Smash Brothers and Pokémon battles in various leagues, get on the metal slab for operations (both times, I get a wedgie without panties) and cue the lion tranquilizers, because they are potent sedatives. Waking up will be a scary experience.

When people wind my windows up in the car. Freaks me out. I have to do it. I remember once having my hand out of the car and my MIL pressed the button to pull all the windows up and I caught my finger between the side of the window frame and the window... it bled a LOT. Ever since then, no matter how far my hands are away from the window, I will flinch so bad. I just associate it with pain.

Also my Sims 2 game being corrupted. Biggest fear. But I regularly use hood checker, have it backed up in 2 places so I should be good... doesn't stop me from sometimes having nightmares about it though.

June 10. I have yet another sedation dentistry extraction. I just hope I don't get another hospital visit from Hell.

Being stuck in a loop, not progressing as a person. Though I think that's a normal fear for a 20 something young adult, right?

@Johnny_Bravo Probably is. I learned absolutely nothing in my job that I couldn't have googled myself if I'd really cared. Quitting was my best decision, and now I feel so much better taking random and interesting courses online and enjoing the weather.

As weird as it is, I'm super concernd about my nails, they don't look the way they used to and it bothers me. But only because I know they used to be really nice but it seems the allergic reaction from that one time and the annual winter inflammation (that goes away in like 2 days if I go somewhere warm like South of Italy) is just too much for them. I dont wanna have old people hands I'm still in my 20s

Going to the gym. Funny one I know and it would be fine once you go but I'm still scared of being awkward not knowing how to use some of the equipment. Not doing the excersises properly is also a bit of a concern since sometimes its hard to correct yourself and your posture etc