Q. What do you call a werewolf-vampire-atrociously evil witch with maximum Body skill?
A. Sir.

Q. What did the dog say when he was hugged by the toddler?
A. Nothing, dogs can't talk.

Q. What do you call a plantsim flying a helicopter?
A. A pilot, you damn racist!

Q. How many Sims does it take to change a light bulb?
A. One, but he has to bat his plumbbob out of the way first.
A. Two, One to do it, the other to congratulate him when he's done.

Q. What's the definition of poetic justice?
A. Feeding the cow mascot to the cowplant.

Q. How do you know if the Autonomous Casual Romance hack has been installed?
A. The Social Worker is in bed next to you instead of walking out the door with your kids.

SimStation Dance is unveiling a new reality TV show for Romance Sims with low aspiration: Dancing With The Mop

Haha, lol at the last one.

Q: How do you know if Boolprop is turned on?
A: There's a stationary, scary-looking baby by your mailbox.

Well, not quite. My first Sims game was "The Sims: Bustin' Out" for the Gamecube console. There was always at least one light bulb needing to be replaced every 1-2 minutes (real time). It was maddening! All my houses eventually had the cheapest light: the "solar powered" lamp that sat on the floor (and never really needed sunlight). They never needed their bulbs replaced, but you needed a lot of them (and there was a limit to how much you could buy per lot).

Q: How do you leave a legacy that out lives you?
A: You teach one person a little song you like to call the "Sea Chanty."

They don't need to be replaced in the PC games though.

True, but the console Sim-areas are arguably a part of the Sim universe/world as there often tie-ins to different characters and neighborhoods.

In the sims 1 base game, light bulbs had to be changed (and sims got electroluted very often ). It changed when wall and ceiling lamps were added.

I guess I'm either too old or too rigid to see the fun in those jokes.

Another ACR-related one...

"How do you know when you've achieved "Big on Campus" status at college?
The dorm cook will sleep with you before serving your Mac n Cheese.

(This happened in my game).

Hmm, that "joke" was pretty lame, but hey, I've just got up!

I never had that happen to me, before, and I have boolprop on most of the time. I check to make sure it's on by shift clicking a sim. So what's with the baby at the mailbox? I've only seen babies appear on my lawn, boolprop on or off.

Shift+click/spawn/SimModder will give you the baby. It's a cheat object to change LTW, relationships and more.

OH! That's what that meant, Lol then yeah I know it.

lol ewwww

A few I just made up:

Q:Why did the sim cross the road?
A: To see what that lamp-post was on the other side.

Two sims drinking in a pub. One says to the other "Why the long face?" The other replies: "borked genetics".

Sim 1. Knock, knock,
Sims 2. Who's there?
Sim 1. Rodney.
(long pause...)
Sim 2. Sorry I'm not in.

I know, I know... completely stupid!

Why did the young adult sim bring a snuggie to class for English 101 and English 102 and then air guitar a G chord?
He wanted to come two terms with his prerequisites before declaring his major.

Uh oh.

LOL not stupid, I thought they were good.

I thought they were funny


My sims always go out in hail to see what an object is. And end up dying. DX

Most of these are pretty funny keep 'em coming guys.

That one is awesome, swiping my screen as is.

Actually because of the behaviour of the sims which can be 'pretty lame' I guess lame jokes are perfectly suited for this game.

I think your right

Q. How many werewolves does it take to change a light bulb?
A. Just one, but it takes more and more lightbulbs each time because the werewolf's strength keeps increasing, resulting in accidentally broken bulbs.

A zombie goes to a specialty shop that sells Simian brains for zombie consumption. On the shelf in the middle of the shop are three brains: one from a university professor, one from a social worker and one from a nanny. The professor's brain is §35, the social worker's is §25, but the nanny's brain is §50.
"Rrrrrg. Why nanny brain so much money?" the zombie asks the sales clerk.
"Oh, that's because it's in pristine condition... never even been used."

I'll argue against it. The consoles are dumbed-down shadow clones of the PC games to expand EAxis's reach to console players in the misguided belief that they were people, too.

Dude, I don't think anyone really cares, this thread has been dead for almost fifteen years and the person you're replying to hasn't been active for a while.

I do not get this one.

The nanny joke was funny, though.

Holy cow (no pun intended), EA has been hinting at this all along! I can't believe I never saw that before.

I didn't see the date on the OP, but I did find it slightly off how it's actual jokes, not memes or the like, when I first opened the thread 3 minutes ago. Long time no hear some actual jokes in my life, actually!

Q: How does Peter Gabriel deal with unwanted visitors in his game?
A: SLEDGE-HAMMER!