Hi there! You are currently browsing as a guest. Why not create an account? Then you get less ads, can thank creators, post feedback, keep a list of your favourites, and more!
Chapter 41. Roe Tells Her Tale
Back to: Chapter 40. Moonlight Next: Chapter 42. Roe Finds the Answer

Roe thought that she could almost watch Thorundur’s wound close under her eyes when she changed the bandage. The speed of healing almost seemed unreal. She could still feel the panic and fear that she had felt when she found him deadly pale in a pool of blood and the desperate hope when she had noticed a faint breath. A deep wound in the chest was always bad and he had lost more blood than she would have believed possible to survive. But his wound had almost healed and his pulse felt strong again. Yet he was still extremely week and complained about pain. He felt dizzy when he walked on unsteady legs and had to lean on her for support. Maybe it was the blood loss that made him so weak after all, even if all physical signs told her that he had recovered. Elves were very different so perhaps their physics was not like other creatures’. She seated him comfortably near the camp fire and left him there to complete her latest task that would be a surprise for him.


The blue cloth was soft under her fingers. It looked alive in the sun, reflecting the light in so many shades of blue. The delicate embroidery had silver woven into the thread. But it was not all blue or silver. Shuddering Roe stroke her finger over a dark stain. Half of fabric had been drenched in blood and no matter how she had tried to clean it there was still an ugly stain. She closed the tear in the fabric with a final stitch and inspected the result. It didn’t look good at all. Roe frowned. Obviously stitching fabric was not the same as stitching wounds. Thorundur’s grandfather’s silk tunic had seen its best days.


As much as she wanted him to recover she feared the day when he wouldn’t need her cares any more. She must not let herself forget that these were the last days that she would spend with him. She had made a sacred promise to The Mother, the spirits and to herself. She would grow up, live with Bear and behave like a normal woman of the Forest people. But sometimes it was so easy to forget that everything would change. They were best friends again. Sometimes Thorundur seemed to have changed though. He had moments when he was quiet and thoughtful and sometimes she could catch him watching her intensely. Did he suspect that she had been involved in Aliendre’s disappearance?


Thorundur laughed when she placed one basket after another filled with delights from the forest in front of him. “This is enough food for a village. It looks delicious.” He took a handful of raspberries and tilted his head. “Roe, you look so sad sometimes when you don’t think that I see you”, Are you sure that you’re making the right choice? Will Bear make you happy?”


“There’s not much of a choice for me to make actually. What else can I do? Besides you’re wrong I’m happy to become Bear’s spouse. He‘s very strong and kind. We’ll have a good life together.” She put on a smile that she hoped looked happy.



“Does he make the blood rush faster in your veins when you think about him?”Thorundur smiled as if he was teasing her but there was a tension in his voice that contradicted the smile.

“I don’t want to talk about this. You will not understand anyway because you’re an elf. Tell me about elves instead. Has it happened before that an elf has made the choice that Aliendre did? I mean to live with a mortal and become mortal.”

He shook his head slowly. “No, that was unheard of and unthinkable. Aliendre is the first to make such a choice. When I first heard about it I was horrified and sad because I thought that she’d chosen death before life. I know better now. Her choice was actually quite the opposite, she chose life because she’s happy know and more alive than she was before.”



A slight desperate hope rose within Roe. “If no one has ever made such a choice before, how can you then know that she will become mortal and die?”

“Oh, everyone knows that. The elder told their children about the ways of the elves and the children in turn told their children. It is also written in our sacred books. The knowledge of the elders has never proved to be wrong so there’s no doubt that she will become mortal. You remember when I told you about why elves worship the sky and the stars? That is because our first home was out there.” Thorundur made a sweeping gesture at the blue cloudless sky above them. “There was a disaster and our people were stranded here. The first elders are now all gone and they were so filled with sorrow after the disaster that they could never speak nor write about it so today no one know exactly how we came here or why. It is known; however, that time is different here than in our first home so that’s why we became immortal. We don’t really belong here but if we would choose to share our life with a mortal we would become part of this world and become mortal to.”

Her last thin slice of hope died. Roe had never heard Thorundur talk so much about the beliefs of the elves. He had never been religious and had always seemed more interested to learn more about the beliefs of the Forest people than to speak about his own religion. She was not convinced that Aliendre was better off being mortal although it would have been such a relief to believe so.

“But how can you say that she has chosen life if she’s going to die? It must be wonderful to live forever.”


“Is it really, if you’re not truly alive? You know how everything freezes in the winter, but in the spring life comes back. Elves are like the winter, frozen, but in contrast to the earth we become more and more frozen with time. There’s no spring for us. Instead we become more and more distant from the world we’re living in the older we get. Except for Aliendre, she was like the spring when I saw her, much more filled with life and happiness than I’ve ever seen in her before.”

Thorundur was truly changed. He had never been thoughtful or philosophical before.

“You’re not like the winter,” she protested. “Frozen is the last thing I would call you.”

“Maybe that’s why I never seem to fit in among my own and maybe it’s thanks to you that I’m so alive,” he said. Roe had expected him to smile in that teasing way when he said the last words but he still looked very serious and thoughtful.

This was no good. She had to change subject before she forgot that she soon would have to part with Thorundur forever. Before she could think of something to say he leaned forward to help himself to some more food and his forearm touched hers. He leaned back and looked at her. Now his knee rested against her leg and she found it difficult to breath.



“Roe, I miss your smiles. You’re so pretty when you smile so that the tip of your fangs shows.”

Surely Thorundur must hear her heart beat. She mustn’t forget that it wasn’t possible that Thorundur could love her more than as a friend or a sister. Not that it would make any difference. She would never let him become mortal. Love between immortal and mortal was impossible, she knew that now. Why did he have to say such things?

She got up on her knees to rise to put some more wood on the fire. Not because there was any need to have more fire but she needed to have some more space between her and Thorundur. But as she tried to get on her feet she could feel his hand closing around her wrist holding her back.


“Please sit down with me Roe. If you’re going to leave me forever when I’ve healed at least you can give me some time with you.”

She sat down because she couldn’t think of anything else to do or say. He was even more beautiful than usual now when he looked so serious and his eyes were so intense.

“Roe, you never answered my question about Bear and don’t tell me that I don’t understand because I’m an elf. Am I your best friend or not?”

Why did his eyes always make her so weak? He was making everything so hard for her. “What question?” she said although she thought she knew.

“Does the blood flow faster in your veins when you think about him? Can you talk with him like you and I talk? Does he understand you like I do?”

These were new questions, if he had asked this before she would remember. What was she supposed to answer? Before she could think of a good answer to make Thorundur stop asking about Bear he continued to speak.


“Has it ever occurred to you that some people might believe that a woman and a man that spend time together like you and I are more than friends? Have you ever considered the possibility that we could have been more than friends?”

Oh, no! This was not fair. Why did he have to say such things!

“You’re an elf and I’m mortal so that wouldn’t be possible. We’re brother and sister.” She looked down because she could not bear to meet his eyes.


“Roe look at me. We’re not truly brother and sister. You always used to protest when I said that, and I always said it to tease you, but also because I was afraid to admit other possibilities. Roe I cannot not imagine life without you. If you have the smallest affection for me, please at least give me a chance. I’m sure I could make you happier than Bear would.”

The despair in his voice made her heart beat so hard that she couldn’t think. He loved her, he must love her but she loved him too much to let him die like she would. Besides she had made a sacred promise. She had told so many lies to so many people but she could not look Thorundur in the eyes and say that she didn’t love him. He knew her so well and they had no secrets for each other. But that was not true! She had a terrible secret, a secret that would make him hate her forever. It was better that he hated her than that he would become mortal. The time that she had dreaded for so long was finally here. She could not escape anymore.


“Thorundur, you don’t know everything about me. I’ve something to tell you. Something terrible that will make you hate me forever.” He started to protest but she put her fingers over his lips and continued. “This is a very long story and afterwards we will not be friends anymore.”

She told him everything about her travel to the Dark elves and the human realm. He listened and his expression became more and more grim. When she talked about the Dark elves he cursed and when she told him about how she got caught by the humans he even got up and kicked his boots at a tree. It was not until later that she realized that he had shown no signs at all of weakness then. When she told him about how she had poured the love potion in Aliendre’s tea she could not bear to look at him and her voice almost broke. Finally she had told him everything and hardened herself to look up and meet his eyes. They were narrow and his lips looked like a thin line.

“I cannot believe what I’ve just heard,” he said finally between clenched teeth. “You let me believe that you were my best friend. I have no words to tell you how disappointed I am Roe.”

Click Next: Chapter 42. Roe Finds the Answer to continue...

 
Back to: Chapter 40. Moonlight Next: Chapter 42. Roe Finds the Answer
Reply With Quote

Click here to view comments, or to add your own.