CHAPTER 9: "The Awesome in Our Possums"



Kim knew that MODM wouldn't leave her behind in the EccentriaVerse forever - or even for long. Still, she began wondering what was taking so long. Yeah, it was boring in there. But at the same time...it was very peaceful and quiet. Too quiet. Which left her vulnerable to the worst thing she now knew: her own mind.

Kim (thinking to self feverishly): "Laugh it up, Amanda! I know this is what you wanted! Hmm...the square root of...nope! That's not gonna work either. Shoot! Where's that sign, MODM? And please don't tell me it's the Bill Engvall kind; or I'll make you my bitch one day!"

A Sharpie pen arrived in her left hand out of nowhere, and she looked on the floor beneath her sink to see that her stuff had been returned to her from the evidence room. She began smiling seemingly from ear to ear, as the evidence handler at the Bozeman police station suddenly noticed that Kim's items were missing.



Det. Lionel Birch: "Guys, we got a problem!"

Marino: "Now what?"

Birch: "The stuff we took off that one girl that you recently put in here for mocking you, Marino?'

Marino: "Oh, gravy! You mean to tell me she magically vanished?"

Birch: "Well...her evidence bag did!"

Marino could barely hold back the blue streak at the tip of his tongue just screaming for a chance to fly out. He was half-convinced that girl would give him tourettes! He immediately informed the chief to place the city jail on lockdown. He raced for Kim's cell as fast as he could get there per protocol, and checked for her. All he found was a message, written in Sharpie pen on the wall.

Marino (screaming, trying very hard not to cuss): "Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!"

Her four words said it all.



Volkonir and company were finding that even with their constant blows weakening Slaisionnach and Clownscavator, the powerhouses that were those two monsters simply didn't relent! And the Slaisionnutties had upped the ante by compromising the Twin Towers Facility near LA! As the bloodshed spread, it seemed like Slaisionnach was the only one who never got tired!

Ross: "Emo Rangers! All focus on Clownscavator now! We'll let the others handle those other guys!"

Stef: "Right! I can't wait to break his heart!"

As the Emo Rangers parted to deal with Clownscavator, the other Rangers found themselves taking quite the beating from the remaining Slaisionnutties. Billy and Tommy could barely manage to keep them away from killing more and more guards; while Jason and Zack attempted to protect inmates from what must have surely looked to them like a zombie apocalypse!

Slaisionnach managed at one point to isolate Kimberly, beating her savagely as she tried desperately to avoid his protruding-retracting super-fangs. He finally beat her into a de-morph, as she kneeled on the ground and panted, blood dripping out of her mouth.

Slaisionnach: "I now eat Pink Pajama Woma-!!!"

Volkonir: "NOT SO FAST!!!"

Alas, he could feel his armor getting weaker! Slaisionnach was simply too tough, and Vinny's efforts to protect the injured Kimberly were only leading to his Golden Lion suit contemplating retreat.

Volkonir: "I'm putting your bloodlust on a diet!!!"

Slaisionnach: "Knight is fool!!! I eat what want!!! And Knight almost dead!"

Meanwhile, Zordon grew increasingly concerned for Kimberly's well-being.

Zordon: "Alpha, we need to get Kimberly out of there."

Alpha: "I'd love to, Zordon, but her communicator is damaged!"

Kayla: "Send me in."

Alpha: "Twin Towers is a dangerous place, Kayla! And you'll have to drag Kimberly out of there manually before I can get a lock!"

Kayla: "I've survived Texas Federal Medical for over a year. I can survive Twin Towers for a few minutes. The team is losing. I hope MODM gets back soon. But you're gonna need me to do what I do best too."

Zordon: "Very well. Alpha, send Kayla to Twin Towers. We need to retrieve Kimberly."

Alpha: "But with her down, who will replace her?"

MODM (suddenly appearing): "I've got just the solution for that! And you guys are gonna love it!"



Slaisionnach gained back some of his super mode, getting ready to go in for the kill as Volkonir weakened to the point of de-mogrification! But as he leapt into the air to pierce the Knight's throat with his retractable fang and deliver a boot blow to the head, an unexpected face flew in with the last thing any of them expected as her weapon of choice: Vinny's Biggby mug!!!

As if in slow motion, Vinny could see his mug shatter to dozens of small pieces upon making contact with Slaisionnach's fang, the fang also shattering into millions of pieces and Slaisionnach getting knocked backwards by Kim's own high-powered flying kick!

Slaisionnach (on ground, in agony, super mode gone): "Dirty ho!!!!!"

Kim: "Yeah!!! Covfefe, bitch!!!"

She pulled out her blaster, shooting Slaisionnach in the stump of his broken fang and inflicting more agony. The monster retreated down the staircase to recuperate from this blow, swearing revenge as he made his way to another part of the prison - near-decapitating anyone that got in his way.

Kim: "And don't ye come back, scurvy frog!!! Or you will be the one with missing thumbs!!! Yarrr!!!!"

Kimberly: "Er...what?"

Vinny (now demogrified): "I'm...pretty sure neither one of us really wants to know."

Kimberly: "O....kay then."



Vinny got Kim's help to drag the significantly-injured Kimberly down the stairs, though Vinny himself also felt significantly weakened.

Zack: "Holy moly! Am I seeing double? That cell block here behind me has an emergency exit on the other end. Kayla's gonna be here any second to fetch the bloodied Kim and get her stitched up."

Vinny: "That...will really help! Any word on the others?"

Zack: "They're gonna regroup. Man! De-morphed already?"

Vinny: "Yeah. Slasionnach is a really tough cookie. Say...was that my Biggby mug?"

Billy (arriving late on the scene): "Yeah, I saw that from a distance. It would appear that the monster's weakness in super mode was ceramic! Go figure!"

Trini arrived through the hallway with Kayla.

Trini: "Yeah, bad news! Slaisionnach has killed nearly all the guards here, and the Slaisionnutties are still everywhere! And Vicken sucks. I blame MODM for that."

Zack: "Aw, sheesh! Now I don't even know who the crazy girl is anymore, you or Kimmy!"

Kayla: "Kim! Holy crap!"

Kim 2017: "Aye? Whose muffins?"

Kayla: "No, the other one!"

Kim 2017: "Poor little other one!"

MODM:: "Stop that! You're gonna get Gwen* showing up behind you, saying things like that!"

Vinny (toward Kim 2017): "You...owe me a coffee mug."

Kim 2017: "I'm an awesome possum!"

Tommy (after having shown up late): "Aw man! Regardless, we gotta get Kim outta here, and get Vinny back on his feet!"

Billy: "What if we each give him a little bit of our remaining charge from this morph to boost his Golden Lion? And you lend him your Dragon Shield so he can heal faster?"

Tommy: "That might work! Let's give it a try!"

Vinny: "Will that even work?"

Billy: "Selshon and the Dragonzord are compatible, somehow. We proved that on Super LlamaDog. We have nothing to lose at this point."

Vinny: "All right. Kayla, you get Kimberly outta here. Billy, Tommy, I need a boost. The rest of you...forget the Slaisionnutties for now. This may seem asinine under normal circumstances, but we should arm the prisoners and let them duke it out with the Slaisionnutties."

Zack: "Oh wow! That's crazy all right!"

Kayla: "He's right. I remember the hall codes we used to have with each other at Texas Federal Medical for what to do if ISIS invaded or some other such thing. If the guards are all down, the prisoners take the fight to the invaders. That way, we'd either take control until the National Guard showed up, or die as heroes against a worse threat to society."

Jason (overhearing Kayla, also showing up late): "We can talk about your experiences with the Suicide Squad later, we gotta get moving!"

Vinny: "Right. Everyone move out! Trini, arm the prisoners. Kayla, rescue our injured. Everyone else, we focus all efforts on Slaisionnach!"

Billy: "What about the Emo Rangers?"

Tommy: "They dragged Clownscavator away somewhere else. They're on their own till we can regroup."

Zack: "All right then! Let's go Russian vampire hunting! Whooooo!!!"

*Note: Gwen Indot in Camelorum Adventures is an inmate at Camelorum whose powers include teleporting behind anyone who steals a quote from elsewhere. Before getting powers, Gwen wanted to be a copyright lawyer. She was locked up for setting a garage on fire by accident, and killing someone's pet ferret. She has the power to make ferrets explode by being near her.



The others scattered, while Tommy and Billy attempted to recharge Volkonir faster.

Billy: "It's working! Golden Tricera-Dragon-Lion Knight is forming!!!"

Vinny: "You made that up just now?"

Tommy: "Oh man, I'm about the only one that shield looks better on than you!"

Vinny: "Good to know. This...surge! Yeah, I FEEL IT!!! That vampire's about to soak up the sun worse than Sheryl Crow!!!"

Billy: "Who?"

Tommy: "Doesn't matter. Time to save this city, with whatever energy these morphs have left!"

Billy: "Right!"



The three of them caught up with the others, with Volkonir tearing through the Slaisionnutties like they were made of Kleenex!

Volkonir: "This clay...is BAKED!!!"

Slaisionnach: "I recover, Knight! And you be dead!!!"

Volkonir: "There's only one way out of this mess, and that's with you dead! You should have left the PercoDome alone! Hanom would have had it mothballed for three months, and it might not have even sold after that! And then, Gwirmalesh could have sent someone competent after it! You have spies in there, don't you? Even those spies could have done a better job!"

Slaisionnach (extremely offended): "I see! Knight want to suffer before death!"

Tommy: "Everyone! Wait for a clear shot, and use your blasters on full! Slaisionnach must die!!!"

Kim, meanwhile indulged herself with the Slaisionnutties that kept coming after them.

Kim (in an unnatural voice, snapping Slaisionnuty necks and then body slamming them): ♫"Let the / Putties / hit the floor! / Let the / Putties / hit the floor! / Let the / Putties / hit the floooooooooooooooooor!!!"♫

Trini: "Somebody get her a therapist!"

Zack: "Screw that, I'm calling an exorcist in the morning!"

Trini: "I'll hold you to that!"

Zack: "I love you!"

Trini (embarrassed): "Ugh! Whatever! You too!"

Zack: "I knew it!"

Trini: "Don't push it!"

Kim: "♫The hills are all dying! / With the sound / of dead goons! ♫/ RIGHTEOUS!!!!"

Trini (thinking out loud): "Psychopath!"

That's when MODM was suddenly struck with inspiration.

MODM: "Hey Billy, can you read me over comms?"

Billy: "What is it, MODM?"

MODM: "I just had an idea! Now that you're mostly drained would be a good time to temporarily swap places with your elseworld counterpart! Then, I can bring their Megazord here and end this!"

Billy: "You sure that will be necessary?"

MODM: "Never hurts to be prepared! Besides, I'm not afraid to escalate a battle once in a blue moon!"

Zordon 2017: "I don't like this."

MODM: "I'm bringing in the Mega Emo Fight Bot too!"

Zordon 1993: "MODM unfortunately has a point. We need to be ready in case Rita takes the logical next route. Slaisionnach is getting tired, and Rita's not about to risk not growing him."

Alpha 2017: "Yeah! Exception to every rule! I can get behind this exception, Zordon!"

Zordon 2017: "Well, it's technically in that universe, not ours. So...fine. Just this once. But we shouldn't make a habit of abusing loopholes in the Morphing Grid. The Power Coins won't like it.

MODM: "Consider it done! Ross! Prepare for the Emo Fight Bots to arrive!"

Ross: "Badass!"

Luke: "Yeah! Squash 'em while they're still tiny! I'm up for that!"



In seemingly the blink of an eye, MODM had Billy transferred to the Command Center to meet his counterpart.

Billy 2017: "Holy fu...dgcicles! Yeah, fudgcicles is fine!"

Billy 1993: "No worries. I'll keep watch over this place until you can get back. We need you to form the Megazord."

Billy 2017: "I-ah-awhl...I'll make you proud, me...no, other me! Man, this is weird!"

Billy 1993: "Welcome to being a Ranger."

Zordon 2017: "We most likely don't have much time. Every time you do this, MODM becomes less stable."

MODM: "Er...continent...no...that sounds even worse. Well, you know what he meant, kids! Off we go!"

Billy 2017: "Worse how?"

MODM: "Well...that depends, I guess. But...that's for later."

Billy began to sense there was a reason MODM wasn't being straightforward with him. There were friends to save, however; and that's what mattered.



Meanwhile, Kayla continued to keep propping up Kimberly as she tried to get the latter to that emergency exit. Red alert lights flashed all over, and the girls saw piles of dead bodies on the floors above them strewn into heaps.

Kimberly: "I hoped I would never have to see a day like this in my life! I'm gonna be sick!"

Kayla: "It's worse than when the Gwirdons attacked Texas Fed Med. Fed Med got pretty messed up too! But today's almost over! Soon comes the dawn, Kim, sense it!"

Kimberly: "I never knew an ex-con could be so nice and caring."

Kayla: "The buzzard killed my daughter. In front of me. For no reason. I punched him. He was a dirty fed. That was it. I wasn't that bad going in. If I didn't become someone better coming out, they didn't do a very good job."

Kimberly: "And now you're saving the multiverse."

Kayla: "Yeah. And yesterday, I was happy just to turn in a college assignment on time."

The girls were soon confronted by a loose inmate: Barbara Weston!

Barb: "Hey, you gals OMH or somethin'??? It's the apocalypse in here, and you 109.10'd the civvie wardrobe to escape? You pick doors wise, or you be backdoor paroled! And who fussed your guss, Valley Girl?"

Kimberly: "What's she talking about?"

Kayla: "Let me handle this. Hey, no time for P4P breakdown, AG, we got a situation! Clay zombies makin' smears of peels an' takin' tourists like this one hostage! Russian MA gone 5150 got several dozen turtles dancing pavement already!"

Barb suddenly got really quiet. Who was this girl in the brown jacket, and why was she so fluent in local lingo without Barb having ever heard of her before? It didn't add up! However, Kayla reached into her pocket and handed the best peace offering she could - a pen.

Kayla: "The clay zombies are a-comin'! Hand this to your daughters, an' tell 'em to fashion! Better than nothing! Only ghosts here!"

Barb took the pen, and quickly headed back to her subservient gang members.

Kimberly: "You're awfully fluent in Prisonese! How long were you gone?"

Kayla: "A year and two months. Plus a few extra days with Hiktomoph taking me hostage. But that's technical. Let's get you back to the Command Center. Trust me, you wouldn't wanna be a fish here!"

Kimberly was unsure what that meant, but was pretty sure it wasn't good. The Command Center, or bust! It didn't take long after they got outdoors for Alpha's signal to find the girls, and they left the field to get Kimberly some medical treatment back at base.